I continue meditating.

I also continue writing ... remembering i must not write anymore about theories telling us about how to boil the hot water.

And ... somehow ... i realise i need to go deeper into the human being ... and dig till i find out the real truths about us.

But ... how the hell i do that?!

Maybe ... experiencing life.

Or maybe better said ... mix the process of meditation with the real life.

Live ... experience ... enjoy ... and late in night ... meditate.

So ... imagine you are into a love story and you do that ... everyday.

Also ... push the limits of communication and go beyond the boundaries of a standard relationship.

Connect .... for real ... and be one.

Speak ... everything.

 

You see ... Freud ... while working with his patients ... used to ask them to allow themselves to speak and simple say ... whatever they want to say.

The therapy itself was based many times on the idea of exploring what's into that moment in the mind and the soul of the patient.

So ... simple take out to surface the thoughts and emotions.

... i mean the real ones.

Actually ... not what we pretend to show while being on the stage of life.

I trend to believe that a real love partner can represent... into a real relationship ... the role of a therapist.

One ... that could really heal.

Listen ... accept ... analyse deeply... define all together ... so that one day to be able to redefine all ... following that perfect scenario we dream about.

Unfortunately ... while having this process ... we might discover lots of weird things.

Even ... see a side of the partner which we did know about .... and totally dislike it.

Or ... hate it ... exists.

I could even say that it's probably like opening Pandora's box.

And ...

A simple scenario ... could be for example ... 2 lovers ... both students in the University of Psychology ... playing this game of saying one to the other all they think and a relationship ... without any boundaries.

Totally connect ... being just one ... soul.

 

But one day ... he says to her that he had a dream ... and he was in bed with her and her best friend.

Both of them ... were touching him ... and ...

Suddenly... she fells ... her soul broken into small pieces ... and ... starts to cry.

"How could you be such an idiot?!

How could you betray me?!

I hate you."

Realising ... she does not pass this test and she's not really ready for having a relationship without boundaries ... he started to laugh load ... "Hahaha! You are nor ready yet! Your mind is too weak at this moment.

I made it up.

All.

It was a test to push you ... and understand how much you could handle it.

But ... you failed ...

All was fine ... while i was speaking about my past ... but the moment when i've told you about Larissa ... you've lost your minds."

She smiled ... being a little bit relaxed and stoped crying.

3 days later ... she asks ... "Do you really want to be with Larissa also?!".

Smiling ... he replies ... "My darling .... we simple need to stop doing those psychological experiments.

You are not ready yet.

You still mix your thoughts with your emotions ... and can't do this exercise with detachment."

But ... she was still ... doubting.

 

And today ... he knew he cannot do this real opening to her ... cause she will feel hurt.

So ... you see ... boundaries are good, cause somehow protect us ... of feeling hurt.

Unfortunately... not being able to open for real ... we can never be in connection.

I believe .... the girl could say .... "The truth is i cannot share you with my best friend.

I just can't.

I can't because .... I am a human.

It's normal.

But ... i am willing to replace that role you see that she can play into your life.

Be .... into the same time ... myself, but also Larissa.

So ..."

I can only conclude that it isl ove letters too complicated to be totally opened with the loved person.

And ... play this role of a psychologist.

Most of us ... are not able to digest ... all related to the partner .... no matter how much they would love that partner.

So ... we love ... but can't really open for real ...

Or maybe i should say ... we only open our hearts ... connect them ... but never connect our minds ... for real.

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in love ... but still playing psychological games - 

philosophical essays” written by the romanian essayist Adrian Dumitru for FREE. 

 

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